But last year, I met a woman who is different from anyone I have ever met before. She is extremely successful in her profession and also in international business. As a result, she is widely respected in the community. Over the years, she has done very well financially.

I was quite surprised when she showed an interest in me. But one evening I gave her a lift back home from a meeting and I was surprised to find that she wanted to know all about my life and work.

She invited me in for coffee, and gave me some helpful advice about my career. She is a few years older than me. Our friendship ripened and a few weeks later, she made it plain that she wanted to go to bed with me.

Doc, she is an attractive woman! So it all seemed wonderful to me. I think I was falling in love with her at that time. But the strange thing was that when we went to bed I could not perform.

I got inside her at the start, but then I suddenly lost it. I felt so embarrassed and ashamed about this. Each time, she just smiled and said: 'It happens '. But unfortunately, it carried on and on happening, again and again. Whenever I went to bed with her, I just failed miserably.

This went on for some months. Eventually, because I was so worried about my lack of virility and the prospect of losing my nature, I decided to try with other women. On each occasion, I was absolutely fine.

Now, I do not see this woman anymore and I suppose I am no longer in love with her. But I encounter her occasionally at business meetings. She just smiles, and says, 'Hi'.

But I think a lot about what happened, and how I failed to please her. What do you think was wrong with me, Doc? And should I make one more attempt to form a relationship with her? Maybe everything would be OK if I used Viagra when seeing her?

A. I have changed some details of your letter, so that neither you nor the woman will be recognised. Your story is not all that unusual. Quite recently, I was consulted by a man who told a similar tale. He had tried to make love to a very distinguished woman, and had been completely unable to do so. He said that he was, 'totally in awe of her'. However, he found no difficulty in having sex with his wife.

What happens in these cases is that a man receives a sexual invitation from a woman who is powerful and successful. He thinks this is a great idea - but deep within his mind, something tells him that he is not 'worthy' of this outstanding woman. Result: he cannot get an erection.

If your relationship with the woman were a 'long-term' one, I would suggest that you have psychotherapy. But really, it sounds like this affair is over. So I do not think that you should go to the trouble and expense of obtaining Viagra.

A. I would be real surprised if that turns out to be the case.

Women do occasionally experience an early menopause at 32 or so, but it is uncommon. So it is much more likely that something else has made your periods stop.

Common causes of absent menses at your age are:

1. Pregnancy (have you done a test?).

2. Psychological shocks (have you had any big stresses recently?).

3. Anaemia (it would be worth having a 'blood count').

4. Hormone problems (which can be diagnosed with the aid of a blood test).

5. Certain drugs (are you on any medication?).

6. Occasionally, excessive exercise (but this is only likely if you are running marathons!).

I feel that you must consult a doctor very soon, to have a good examination and some blood tests. I wish you well.

A. It is possible to catch a sexually transmitted infection (STI) by being given oral sex. However, transmission of HIV in this way is a little unusual.

The two infections that you would be most likely to pass to your wife are chlamydia and gonorrhoea ('the clap'). It would be wise to let a doc check you out before resuming sex with your spouse.

A. No, it should be fine. But please make sure that you use plenty of lubricant, which you can buy from pharmacies.

A. People do not generally keep getting flu. As a rule, if you are unlucky enough to catch influenza, you then have immunity for a long time afterwards.

Are you sure that it really is flu you are getting? Folks often think that they have influenza, when really they only have a bad cold. In the same way, some people keep 'diagnosing' themselves with dengue.

Anyway, if you really do catch the flu, the best thing is to stay at home and go to bed. Drink plenty of water, and take either aspirin or paracetamol. Do NOT go outside and spread the germs to other people !

A. If you are correct about its location, this is almost certainly a urinary caruncle. A caruncle is a little swelling in the last part of the urinary pipe. It is quite common in women over 35. It is NOT cancerous.

If you go to a doc, she will examine you to confirm the diagnosis. You would need to take a small operation to cure this caruncle.