POSITIVE Parenting

There's no denying that in the first year of a child's life, the mother plays a bigger role than the father. Unfortunately, in Jamaica, often the latter is not involved at all. The question is, out of all the dads who are around, are there those who would like to do more with their kids than the mums allow? Do some women think men are incapable of giving the same amount of care? Or, is it the fellows themselves who believe they are unable to do a good job?

Most of the Jamaican males I know are quite happy to leave their ladies to the nurturing of their babies, my father included. Once they are walking, talking, and potty-trained, however, these men are more than willing to do all the fun stuff! Until, of course, the children start whining. Then it's back to mamma they go!

'Proud fathers'

I'm sorry, but am I missing something here? Aren't said 'pickney' the offspring of you lads as well? You're all about telling people how proud you are of becoming a father, so step up to the mark why don't you! If you were to set foot into another Western country, you'd be shocked to see that daddies do as much as mummies! Yes indeed, they do get up in the middle of the night to change the baby's dirty diaper!

My husband is no exception to this. From day one, he's been dealing with as much poop as I have. To be honest, we have the opposite problem. Honey hubby is jealous of the extra time I get with our son during the week. He goes to work, I write from home. This is the reason I express breast milk and store bags of it in the freezer. It allows him and our son to bond during feeding time at night. What a stir I created a few weeks ago, when I insisted that the baby was not taking as much milk from the bottle as he would directly from the breast. I swore this was why he was not sleeping through the night! My spouse was very upset with me, and I know he felt a bit left out.

Although I hate to admit it, I was wrong. The following few evenings, I'd feed the baba, but this did not improve the sleep situation. It was worse, actually. Every two hours the sneaky fellow was waking up to suck. Clearly, I couldn't go on like this without collapsing from exhaustion. Then, the 'brainiac' himself (husband) had an idea. Why didn't he do all the feeds that fall between seven and seven? There was more than enough milk bags in the freezer and it would mean that I could catch up on some zees!

Eternally grateful

So, as I sit here writing this, I have had two nights, in a row, of eight hours of complete and undisturbed sleep. No waking up, not even to use the bathroom. I have not heard a peep from baby either time. (A mother's instinct, upon hearing her crying kid is to go straight to him or her.) According to his daddy, our boy has woken up a couple times to eat, once I've gone to bed at nine. They've clearly been as quiet as mice, for which I am eternally grateful. I wonder if we can keep this arrangement up? After all, our son is still as happy as he's been for the last three months. Roll over Mummy, it's Daddy's turn!

Emmadaltonbrown@gmail.com