Dear Counsellor:

I am attending a high school in Kingston. Whenever I am to do an examination, I become nervous and fearful. I don't do well in examinations because of this. I would like some help in improving my grades.

- Sonia

Dear Sonia:

You seem to develop anxiety when you are about to take examinations. This problem affects many other students.

Exams are usually viewed with fear and worry. People worry that they will fail even though they are well prepared. A little anxiety keeps individuals on their toes but too much will interfere with performance. You need to practise relaxation exercises. Deep breathing is very good for calming your anxiety. Sometimes the anxiety is so great that some medication is given.

Studying and practising the past questions should be routine. If you are not adequately prepared for the various tests, you will be fearful and worried. There are techniques for passing exams. You need to practise answering past-paper questions and study them. Many times certain questions are repeated in a different way.

Practising the past questions will give you the edge you need to get a good grade. Various bookshops sell the past papers as well as booklets with worked examples. When you are doing the questions, you might find that you have to seek the help of your teachers to explain certain issues.

Prayer is very much part of your preparation. You need to exercise your faith, knowing that you have done the necessary studying.

Nutrition is important as your brain is working overtime and needs calories, vitamins, minerals and nutrients. Take your nutritional supplements daily and eat nutritious meals.

Single parent distressed

Dear Counsellor:

I am a single mother with two small children. I feel very stressed and have difficulty coping daily.

- Anna

Dear Anna:

Stress is what makes up life, so we have to expect that life is not stress free. Each day we have to solve problems and make far-reaching decisions. Acceptance of stress is half the battle won. In managing stress, you need to organise yourself and seek the help of others.

Make a list of your daily activities. This will give you an idea of time spent in certain activities. Give priority to certain activities and eliminate others from your schedule. Some things are needed while others are dispensable. Decide for yourself the goals you have and work towards achieving them.

As the saying goes, it takes a village to raise a child. There are nurseries and after-school facilities in many communities. Some of these facilities are managed by churches. If you attend a church in your area, you can find out the various activities that are available there. Friends, family and neighbours can assist you in a variety of ways. Seek out a support system and encourage others to help you. You may have to help others out sometimes.

Parents have needs that must be attended to. Take good care of yourself. Get adequate sleep, nutritious meals and relaxation periods. Do exercise like walking, and pray daily.

It is not easy being a single parent but nothing is easy. The grass is not always greener on the other side. What has happened to the father of the children? Try to get him to help you out.

If you have personal and family problems, email questions to Dr Yvonnie Bailey-Davidson at yvonniebd@hotmail.com or call978-8602.