My friend and colleague, Kishan Kumarsingh, is in Bonn, but not duty-free. He is attending a climate-change meeting at the headquarters of the United Nations Framework Convention on Climate Change, but in spite of the work had time to frame a pun or two.

Kishan, an inveterate punster, wrote: "Hi Tony - Hope all is well. In Bonn for the climate-change talks at the moment. A bit cold and in fact, it hailed yesterday (not Mary though) and one of my female friends felt some of it while I didn't; but then, of course, I am in Germany and hail hit her, not me. Thought you would like that."

I did, of course, and responded: "Sounds like you're having a hail of a good time. However, remember that hail hath no fury like a woman stoned. All hail! Tony."

I thought of other stuff that I did not write. Was the woman hail and hearty? Did he check out the German-American rock band, 'Bonn Jovi', or their German-Irish rock-star, Bonno, or was he unable to perform because he had left his harp in Sam Frank's Disco?

world's oddest book titles

I had actually decided to write a completely different column this week. I was going to feature the competition for the world's oddest book titles and, coincidentally, when I got Kishan's note, I was looking at the 2007 awards shortlist where one of the contenders was How Green Were the Nazis? In other words, were they environmentally friendly until the climate changed for their brand of extremism? Were they chagreened when all hail broke loose?

The year 2007 seemed to be a good one for outlandish titles. One of the favoured candidates that year was The Stray Shopping Carts of Eastern North America: A Guide to Field Identification.

It seems that you have to look for wheels that are Hi-Lo. There was also a flavoured candidate, Delicious Ice Cream: D. Di Mascio of Coventry: An Ice Cream Company of Repute, with an Interesting and Varied Fleet of Ice-Cream Vans. The ice-cream book was written by Roger DeBoer, so you know why you shouldn't read it. Speaking of flavour, this year's winner of the oddest book title is The 2009-2014 World Outlook for 60-milligram Containers of Fromage Frais, by Philip M. Parker. While not exactly a homage to fromage, it contained many an elegant frais deserving praise.

politically incorrect jokes

As you see, Kishan's bonny little missive had already set me on a different course. We are both punsters. It means also that we are not squeamish and would treasure even the most politically incorrect joke like, 'How do you make a hormone?' Don't pay her.

Punsters are indiscriminate in their tastes - they are like vultures, and what better birds to choose to kick off a pun (or two or even three) for the road. This vulture boarded an aeroplane carrying two dead racoons. The flight attendant looked at him and said, "Sorry, sir, but only one carrion per passenger." Why did the Mexican shoot his wife? Tequila. What famous novel is about a bird found in the Southern United States with a penchant for Mexican alcohol? Tequila Mockingbird. Which way do you turn the key on a Chinese Ming dynasty desk? Antique-clockwise. And finally, why did the vegetarian drown while eating a bowl of muesli for breakfast? A strong currant pulled him in. Stands to raisin it will. Could the muesli have harboured a cereal killer?

Tony Deyal, who believes that a good pun is its own reword, was last seen complaining about a piece of furniture he bought recently to use as a filing cabinet. He opened it and 14 people fell out. How could he have known it was a missing person's bureau?