Not everyone is hopping and skipping to Christmas carols, ad jingles and shopfront teasers. Beneath the mass of holiday cheerleaders is a growing underbelly of discontentment.

For many Jamaicans, the seasonal mood of merriment, generally manifested in religious reflection, philanthropic gestures, drunken binges or shopaholic fixes, has melted away. Santa's jovial 'ho, ho, ho' is being drowned out by the mantra of the disconsolate: Bah humbug!

A wide range of disappointment, from broken relationships to family dislocation, has forced some to check into 'Heartbreak Hotel'.

Just months ago, Charlene Burke* was looking forward to Christmas. She enjoys the season's rituals - decorating the house, baking cakes, going shopping, the works. But her plans have been shattered because she is no longer in the relationship she spent six years cultivating.

"I am just not feeling the Christmas vibe right now. Usually, I would have gone on the road and got my spread for the bed and everything but since he left I have lost my appetite for everything," she told Saturday Life.

"I don't know how I am going to manage during the holiday because I feel this emptiness inside and I know it is going to get worse when Christmas Day and New Year's Day come," she added.

Too depressed for company

Burke said while she has the option to celebrate with others, she's too depressed to be around them and doesn't want to spoil anybody's fun.

Jamaica-born Janice Guy, who lives in the United States, journeys here to spend time with family every Christmas. But this year, she won't be able to maintain the tradition because of the global economic crisis.

"I know that I am going to go crazy staying here for Christmas but I cannot afford the ticket and to get gifts for everybody and find spending money," Guy says.

Guy has a strained relationship with her dad, who sponsored her to reside permanently in the US. Spending Christmas with him is not an option. Her boyfriend doesn't celebrate Christmas and, thus, has no plans to travel interstate for a visit.

"I guess I will have to do a lot of studying and pretend it is a regular day," Guy said.

"I was on my own for Thanksgiving, so I will just try and sleep out the day as I did then."

For others, death, divorce, depression and loneliness have destroyed the warmth and joy of the season.

Family gatherings laid to rest

Christmas for Tiffany Walters* contrasts with the merry mood of other celebrants. She lost her grandmother, the matriarch who kept the family together, during the Yuletide season a few years ago. But when she died, the big family gatherings at Christmas were laid to rest with her.

"I live in Kingston now and my job keeps me from going home very often. This year, it's the same. It does not look like I'll be able to spend Christmas back home."

Although she tries to lift her spirits by going out with friends, she finds it difficult to deal with homesickness.

For 20-year-old Carina Tomlinson*, the story has a similar resonance. She had to migrate to the United States to live with foster parents a year ago. She has left behind family, friends, as well as her church community.

Carina has also had to grapple with the pain of dislocation - her best friend and boyfriend are still in Jamaica. Having to adjust to a whole new life, without her partner's support, has been a culture shock.

"There are better opportunities for me here but I still feel cold and very lonely and Christmas only makes it worse," she explained. "I miss him and I wish I could get a chance to go home."

Joyless christmas

For Joy Boyne, Christmas has transformed her name into an irony. She became the household breadwinner after her husband was laid off recently.

Now they're in the dumps. The couple has had to cut back significantly on expenses. This season, they have also had to move in with her mother-in-law because their home is being renovated.

"I remember when things were better in the years before and, when I look at where we are now, ... it's a little depressing but I have faith that things are going to be better this year."

Some churches in the United States have decided to add what they call 'Blue Christmas' services to their programmes. They don't play joyful carols or decorate the church in festive colours. Instead, the initiative is geared towards giving people who are not happy during the season and a chance to worship, or cry freely, without being pitied by others.

* Real names withheld

A change of perspective is critical coping strategy for persons struggling with depression to rescue themselves from a maelstrom of melancholy.

The Reverend Roger Kirby, pastor of Calvary Missionary Church in Morant Bay, St Thomas, suggests that focusing on the real meaning of Christmas - the age-old tradition of benevolence - might help realign priorities.

One can spend time arranging activities to help persons and institutions in need, such as children's homes or nursing facilities. Enlisting in charity campaigns could help to distract persons from the loneliness and depression that assail persons with holiday hangovers.

Contrary to the maxim 'misery loves company', Kirby believes that get-togethers and other social activities could facilitate a shared space for those going through Christmas crises and others who have overcome.

Persons grappling with the pain of loss of a loved face even greater challenges but they are advised to rely on strong support systems that facilitate disclosure, openness and compassion. Talking and crying can unlock cathartic relief. Isolation, however, can exacerbate the sense of loss, causing clinical depression.

Avoiding Christmas grump

Learn to enjoy spending time with yourself. You don't need others to fulfil you. It doesn't take others to go for a walk, enjoy nature, needlepoint, quilt, read a book, etc. Instead, you can do these things alone and have a blast.

Become committed to feeling content. Whether you are lonely or content depends on you. You alone control how you react to situations. Every day, repeat positive affirmations.

Visualise yourself happy. Don't see yourself moping around and miserable. Instead, see yourself as vibrant and happy.

Make an effort to reconnect with old pals. In order to have friends, you have to be a friend so begin now to plant seeds of love and friendship.

Attend or host a holiday gathering. Don't alienate yourself from others. Instead, get out there.

Meet new people. Make a commitment to meet at least three new people during the holiday season.

Concentrate on serving others during the holidays. Volunteer at the local soup kitchen, assist the homeless or join some other organisation.

Source: ehow.com